Pennsylvania Hazing?

We woke up on Saturday morning to find a dead raccoon on our front porch! I wasn't sure if it was some sort of hazing but when I went to bury it it looked like it had been hit by a car. I am sure it stumbled into our yard in search of aid and finding only slack-jawed yokels, died on our porch. In our Elders quorum we have adopted the Relief Society's practice of giving a good news minute at the beginning of class and this is the story I shared at church today.